Does bullying happen in our churches?
As numbers of clergy turn down, earlier the growth in younger ordinands offsets this, there will be some pressure on numbers nationally. But that disguises the uneven distribution and ages of clergy across different dioceses. Some dioceses take more 40% of their clergy over 60, and so volition see a significant drop in clergy numbers in the next five to 10 years—unless clergy are attracted into these dioceses in significant numbers. As several people have pointed out in discussion, the claiming for the Church building is non just therecruitmentof clergy only theirmemory anddeployment, and a central part of that is whether clergy feel they are well treated, managed and supported.
An of import Grove Pastoral booklet addresses 1 vital but uncomfortable attribute of this: the presence of bullying and coercion within the Church building. The author, Rosemary Power (who is a member of the Iona Community), begins with the painful reality of bullying within the Church:
A few years ago, a mature, able clergywoman divulged how she had been bullied out of her ministry and her health. She had been forced to take a case to her church building. She finally won, just was also exhausted to do other than retire. She was one of many people who are pushed out of church life, or who walk abroad, perhaps forever. How tin churches, which seek to nowadays the dear of God to a hungry world, have such a problem with bullying?
In 2011, when speaking on bullying at the Catholic National Justice and Peace Conference, I received an interview request from the Cosmic weekly The Tablet. Church bullying must be very rare, the journalist postulated.
It is not: figures from the Faithworkers' branch of the trade matrimony Unite bear witness that 30% of its helpline calls are almost bullying. People who have been the subject of past bullying may not wish to speak of the humiliation and abuse they have experienced, usually over a prolonged period of time, simply during the class of writing this book, numerous people take commented on bullying in church life. (p iii)
Rosemary carefully explores what bullying is, drawing on expert analysis and highlighting its primal characteristics.
Bullying is the sustained use of power destructively against another. It takes an act of will by the perpetrator and requires the acquiescence of onlookers.
The bullied person is frequently criticized, isolated, silenced and deliberately overworked. They may put up with a cracking bargain to protect a loved church and the work it does, often on behalf of those who need it. Nevertheless, the situation may brand them very stressed, which can lead to malfunctioning, which in turn enables the bullying to escalate. Farther, they tin be spiritually undermined and feel theirs is an isolated affair, perhaps brought on by some grapheme defect.
The bully often has a history of this behaviour simply is not ever initially enlightened that the consequences are serious and unjustifiable. Bullies can be people in senior positions, colleagues, or members of a congregation. They sometimes appear to be aggressive and frequently form alliances. Where there is a weak church hierarchy, bullying in two directions tin happen simultaneously.
Bullying depends upon a combination of spirituality, power and insufficient accountability, with the bullied person and witnesses being silenced. Where people with insufficient management skills or accountability are placed in positions of say-so, there is the danger of bunco by inertia, fear or agile intent, and an unwillingness to challenge activities of church members or colleagues. There may be a refusal to larn from secular practise, and the feel of beingness judged past gild causes shock and deprival.
The response required involves confronting spiritual malaise. The circumstances need to be changed in order to reinstate a moral balance. Information technology is important to recognize that bullies, not their targets, are accountable. A culture of bullying damages the mission of the church and the community of believers. It as well damages the public and moral attractiveness of the churches, and the reputations and effectiveness of those involved. Some forms of bullying are unlawful. A good response is to address an issue at the early stages, seek informal resolu- tion where possible, consider the opportunities for healing change, and and so use written structures and processes, ideally with outside help. (pp v–6)
In the following chapter, Rosemary looks at the causes of consequences of bullying, cartoon on testimony from people in dissimilar situations who have experienced it for themselves. These testimonies are a vital but painful read, as they bring into focus the personal toll of this experience.
I tried to be kind, conciliatory, simply the response was to heap more work on me. I regularly received complaints nearly the volunteers, but was refused when I asked for a word. When the work was successful, I was told it was happening in spite of, not because of, me. I had to go off with stress in the end. The union got me a settlement merely I'd lost the centre of my life. The work I'd initiated ceased. This afflicted people living in poverty but their needs were not regarded. (p 10)
Every bit a key reflection, Rosemary notes the connexion between the presence of bullying and the wider sense of force per unit area that many experience the Church (and their ministry building) is currently under.
Those who make a career in the church building might find as they come towards retirement that the condition they expected to achieve no longer exists. As churches shrink in numbers, and public standing and civic roles refuse, ministers are stretched ever thinner geographically. When conflict emerges, those tasked to deal with information technology may be overwhelmed. They may themselves exist overawed or exhausted by the bullies, who may be long-time colleagues and people on whom they depend. Farther, people nether stress are unlikely to behave well all the time, and those charged to deal with a conflict may need to consider the emotional pressures to all parties. (p 12)
After some very helpful theological reflection, including an exploration of Jesus' response to the abuse of ability, the author then sets out some practical responses for all involved. This includes practical and spiritual actions to be taken by those experiencing bullying, those who are accusing of perpetrating bullying, and those who are onlookers—the phenomenon of bullying involves all three parties. This includes the important and profound ascertainment: 'You are not damaging the church'southward reputation past protesting bad treatment through the formal structures. You may be lancing a eddy.'
Rosemary concludes with this reflection:
When writing this book, three matters struck me on a personal level. First, I heard of many bullying situations. Had these been normal employment situations, they should have been subject field to codes of behave and ultimately the constabulary, and the labour of addressing the issues would have fallen to others to deal with. Yet the bullying I heard of frequently continued, and had to be dealt with, alongside an agile ministerial part, and the reasons for information technology were never articulated. Indeed, a church might regard its behaviour as normative, and even well-intentioned, with representatives not grasping the negative touch on of sure conduct. I likewise found there was sometimes an undercurrent of fearfulness, insolence towards the target person and the experienced ministers or other professionals who tried to help, and a lack of willingness to address the problem dispassionately. This was then reverse to the description of love in one Cor 13 that information technology convinced me of the need for an outside person to be present in a decision-making position when there is conflict. Yet assistance from inside can be crucial every bit well: my editor and myself institute ourselves both speaking of the same Anglican bishop who had intervened positively in separate situations of which we were aware. (p 25)
This is such an important consequence for the health of the Church—as well as for the health and well-beingness of individuals at every level. Yous can order the booklet for £3.95 mail service-free (in the Uk) or equally a PDF e-book from the Grove website. Is there someone you know who needs to read this?
(These extracts first published in 2016.)
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